Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
