I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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