if you like me you must not know who I am
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Two words: blizzard sex
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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