where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
