from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize