census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Say something about gay babies.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
It was confusing and full of hummus
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
