awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
