what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
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