I love black thongs
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
