Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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