I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
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