I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
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