My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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