Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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