she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
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