Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
