You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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