So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Can I color on your dick again?
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
