thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
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