: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
