It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
