Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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