no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
