Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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