He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
