The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
We are all done wearing pants today
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Randomize