nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
