your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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