my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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