Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops