Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
