I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
