There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
