Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
