I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Less talking, more tequila
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
