If that was your dad, he is hot
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
