i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
