For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
