you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
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