I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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