Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
