Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
It was confusing and full of hummus
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
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