We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
