i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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