So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Randomize
