You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
