I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
