What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize
