she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
