can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
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Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
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It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
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